This post is coming to you from Studio D Salon, the hair care choice of both the Modern Urban Gentleman and his Sensible Feminist. In fact, both of your beloved columnists don’t only go to the same facility but share the very same stylist, Brittany.

Yes, you are reading that correctly: the Modern Urban Gentleman goes to a hair stylist. There is no reason for shame; in fact, a hair stylist is a great choice for a gentleman’s needs. These ladies and gentlemen are trained, passionate professionals who are constantly honing their crafts by attending seminars and workshops. They often have dynamic personalities and are in tune to the latest styles, putting you ahead of the curve if you are brave enough to trust them.

And you must find a stylist you trust. Try a few; make sure your personalities gel and you can communicate clearly and comfortably with the person you are entrusting with your scalp. That trust goes both ways; you must be honest and straightforward with your stylist.

A former stylist of the Modern Urban Gentleman, who has since gone on to greener pastures, recently shared the list of eight lies you need to stop telling your hairdresser; some are nearly exclusively female-oriented, but the gentleman can learn a thing or two from perusing the list. Pay special attention to the admonition about allowing the stylist to “do whatever you want.” If you say this, make sure you mean it. If you have a strong, trusting relationship, the stylist will make you look good, but it may take you outside your comfort zone.

The journey to Brittany has been a long odyssey for the Modern Urban Gentleman. For the first 24 years or so, this gentleman wandered in the wilderness of shopping mall hack jobs. It was a twist of fate that brought some direction to these hair stylings.

One day, while walking by Holiday Hair at the local shopping center, the unmistakable laugh of a co-conspirator on a long-ago political campaign caught this gentleman’s ear. As it turned out, Rusty was more than happy to welcome an old acquaintance into his chair. It was not long before Rusty moved on to Washington, D.C., leaving the Gentleman in the care of his colleague, Matt.

Now, no disrespect to the fine people of the Regis Corporation, but it was a relief when Matt moved to an independently owned salon. The new place had more personality, freer spirits, and, most importantly, free wine. This is key: find a salon that serves wine. From there, Matt moved to Studio D (the Modern Urban Gentleman followed) and then to Los Angeles (alas, too far to travel for a haircut). Enter Brittany, the stylist working on your humble servant this very day.

A haircut is not just a haircut for the cultured man. A gentleman without a hair strategy, no matter how fashionably dressed or well-read, will always appear rough around the edges. The changing seasons allow for variety in hairstyles: shaved close on the sides with just enough to comb on top in winter, then grown out to match the Movember mustache.

Much like sunglasses and beards, the best hairstyle is fitted to each man’s face shape. There are plenty of online advice columns to suggest pairings, but it can be difficult to truly assess a face that you’ve stared at in the mirror for decades. The best resource for hairstyle recommendations is, of course, your stylist.

Go no longer than six weeks between cuts. For hair kept short, four is better; longer hair can wait for eight. Be sure to schedule your next appointment as you pay for the current cut; otherwise, being a man, you will let it slide and find yourself overgrown and disheveled. Between cuts, enlist the assistance of your beloved to keep neck hair at bay. Nothing intricate is required: just have him or her shave downward from the hairline with unguarded clippers — you know, the same ones you use for your, um, beard.

Guys, we all remember when a haircut cost your-age-plus-a-dollar. The days of the $9 snip and shampoo are over. Be prepared to spend a bit of cash on a good trim. But given how rapidly the numbers in the age column are going up, a $30 cut may end up being cheaper than the old kids’ cut formula would demand.

Remember: like most of the key components of a gentleman’s image, a slick haircut is an investment. It is also recompense for the years of hard work, experience, and research accumulated by your stylist. If you need more convincing, here is some good reading about the true cost of a haircut. And a gentleman always remembers to tip generously.

There is one shortcoming to a salon: very rarely can a gentleman get a proper shave at a business that makes most of its money in women’s dye jobs. In many jurisdictions, including the Modern Urban Gentleman’s home state of Pennsylvania, only a licensed barber — not a stylist — can wield the razor blade near a man’s face. The barriers to a barber license can be steep, and with the dearth of true gentlemen in this day and age, the paltry demand can lower the potential payoff, keeping barbers few and far between. If you do find and settle on a barber, keep in mind that while wine is essential to the salon experience, the hallmark of a good barbershop is free-flowing whiskey.

Mind items one and two on the “eight lies” list above: the gentleman must carve out time to style his hair with the appropriate product each day. Take the advice of your stylist or barber to determine what the right product is, and don’t expect to look as good as you do when you exit the salon without some effort.

Gentlemen, it is far too easy to dress up a great look and then blow the effect with terrible hair. Take your haircuts seriously and you’ll be rewarded not just with your improved image, but quite possibly with a lifelong friend and confidante.